Fantasm: 2002
or
How to finish your drunken vacation in style
04/02/02

After a whirlwind tour of Los Angeles and Las Vegas, it was only fitting that I end my end my vacation with a weekend of TRUE decadence at Fantasm in Atlanta. At best, I knew I could depend on some near naked women and a generous portion of genuine kink, but I also predicted the worst in that I was long overdue for a spontaneous combustion of my liver and a complete failure in my musculature. Additionally, I had narrowly escaped getting a nasty virus in LA and knew that my sleeping habits in Vegas weren't exactly condusive towards a healthy defense against intruding virii. I was on a slippery slope, and it was about time I got some rest. Get it? Rest! At Fantasm! Man, I'm a barrel of laughs!

I also had a few prior engagements. I had signed up to introduce the guests at the con opening and that was a scary thought considering I knew NOTHING about ANY of them. On Saturday, I was scheduled to host the Cam Girl panel... another scary thought since we hadn't exactly worked out all the details regarding it. And then on Saturday Night, I was featured as one of the Iron Bartenders. And quite frankly, last year's secret ingredient left me worried about that one as well. Stress and I haven't been getting along lately, and I was hoping I wouldn't get some bizarre case of "humorists block" when it came time for me to get the audience giggling.

Here I am in my nifty red smoking jacket... Yeah yeah, I know I don't smoke.
This is me pretending to know something about the guest while they insulted my sexual prowess!

This is Shadow... she was my favorite costume of the weekend...
I don't see a seam... do you?

Here's Stephanie as a blue princess... And that's Jerry, one of my favorite people in the world.

Here's Fantasm's attempt at a world record: The World's Largest Human Sundae!

It's important to stress that this was NOT a pleasant experience, as best I can tell.
People had syrup pooling in their ears and various ingredients in their eyes.

Notice the pooling ice cream on these poor souls. Remind me never to trust photographers bearing sweets!

As usual, they had body painting going on with exceptional canvases.

And during it all, The Concoction Contest. Various elixers were brought in to compete for the crown,
and avoid the mantle of the night's worst. Actually, none were TOO hidious this year.

Fey inspiration for continued consumption.

"Party on, Wayne"
"Party on, Garth"

It was called Rocket Fuel... as best I can tell it was a frozen margarita made with PGA.

Needless to say, Dawn latched onto it like a recently weaned teat.

"Honey, It's simple. I dress like a disco ball, and all the lights follow me!"

Josie and Stephanie are missing the other primary color.